When You Can Feel God Working

I don't very often feel I sense when God is talking to me, or shouting at me "do this!".

I have friends who are like "God told me to do this...".
I usually stare blankly because I don't experience that very often.

I'm more the type that if God is trying to tell me something, He needs it on a huge billboard, then played through the song I hear on the radio, then to send HIMSELF to me in a dream or something.

But...Every once in a great while, I do feel God sending me a message. I do feel Him working on me, even through me. Those rare moments are such a blessing. They catch me off guard, and almost overwhelm me to a point.

Well the lightbulb went off, and I've had a moment where I've felt God working through me. Looking at it, it's amazing the way He connected pieces of my life together.

Remember how I participated in the 40 Days for Life campaign? I've gone twice to downtown Toledo and prayed outside the abortion clinic there. The first time it was a very moving experience for me. The last time, it wasn't as moving. However, the last time, as I was noticing a street guy (assumed homeless) walking by, I noticed he was talking to himself, not making sense, as if he was in an argument with someone we couldn't see. He was not presentable looking. He was not clean. He reminded me of my brother Kevin.

Once we were driving away, I realized he must have come from the shelter around the corner. The Cherry Street Mission offers shelter and food and warm meals to the needy.
My brother, Kevin, has often relied on such shelters.
 He is schizophrenic.
Since he was 18 or 19, he has spent so much of his life roaming about, going from one shelter to the next. He is alive truly because so many good people on earth have helped him.

That man I saw walking when I was praying at the abortion clinic, he really reminded me of my brother when he is unstable and off his medication.

Fast forward a few days.

Thursday at school, Aidan and the rest of the school made hundreds of pb&j sandwiches for the hungry.

The whole school worked together on this service project, and Aidan really enjoyed it. I am proud he understood what he did. I am proud he is in a school that does such things.

Guess who they were giving these sandwiches to?
Cherry Street Mission, the same shelter mentioned above.

When I realized this, I had another lightbulb moment. I realized there was a very real chance my brother may have relied on this shelter. He lived in Michigan for many years, and during that time left home and went God knows where. Toledo is a place he would have passed through.
I realize this is a small chance, but it gave me some perspective.

I found the shelter's website and looked at their list of Urgent Needs.
How could I not?

I kept it in mind when I was grocery shopping the other day, and I picked up a few things from their list.
I am excited to show the 2 bags to Aidan, and for us to all drive there and drop them off. I think it's so important for young kids to see this as they grow up.
The world is so much bigger than we are, and we need to do our part to help.

I not only feel like we're helping the needy that come to this shelter, but in some small way, I feel like we're helping my brother. Or at least returning some of the kindness he has received so much of.

God connected pieces together: my prayer time at the clinic-->the homeless guy walking by--> the shelter-->Aidan's school donating sandwiches to this shelter-->it making me think of Kevin-->finding the shelter's list of needs-->God connected these things in my life, and I feel like He wants me to help out, even if it is in a small way.

I don't feel it often, but when I can feel God working, it's quite the feeling. Humbling.

Have you ever had an experience where you've felt God working through you?

It's Nivek's Birthday!!

Happy Birthday to Nivek,

otherwise known as Kevin!!

Kevin is my 2nd oldest brother, now 45 years old, I think. He's currently living in California and we don't see him nearly enough.

Kevin is unique. He is unbelievably smart, resourceful, and his survival skills enable him to outdo the common person, in my opinion.
He is a protective brother and fun uncle. I miss him and wish my kids knew him better.

Kevin is also schizophrenic.
To a lot of people this means they won't get to know him better. To many, it means they can't see past that word....that label. "Schizophrenic". Yes, he is mentally ill. But he is also one of the most normal people I know, in different ways.

He is honest to a fault, his memory is impeccable, and his heart is golden.
It's unfortunate that he struggles with this illness, as it does prevent him from living what most of us would consider a "normal" life.

However, Kevin is such a gift. He has taught us so much.

Kevin was diagnosed right around the time I was born. He was 17. Since I was a newborn, I have known him no differently. I don't have the memories of him growing up, or of his childhood like some of my siblings do. My older siblings may remember him before he started to "change".

What's amazing, though, is that Kevin has taught me that you love someone know matter what. Regardless of illness or disability, you love them. Especially if you are from the same family.
Kevin, through his life, has taught me that the generosity of others can truly save a life.
The generosity of others, as in complete strangers, providing him with food/shelter, has saved him time & again.

I know God makes no mistake, and Kevin was put on this earth for a reason.
He is my brother and I love him.
Happy Birthday, Kevin! I hope you have a great day!

Day 8 of 10

Aidan is lucky to have so many aunts & uncles who love him. I come from a family of 8 kids, and my husband is one of 3. That alone adds up to his favor. :)

Today not only marks the "8 0f 10" days of Aidan. Today is my 2nd oldest brother's birthday.

Happy Birthday, Kevin! Nivek! Coneecheewa!

Kevin is amazing. He is, in a way, a hero to me for all that he has survived.
You see, Kevin is mentally ill. He suffers from schizophrenia. To be exact, he has been diagnosed as suffering from acute paranoid schizophrenia. Long word, and equally as complicated illness.

Despite this illness, Kevin has survived so much. He is truly amazing! And get this-he earned his degree, too, and of all subjects? He has his Bachelors in PSYCHOLOGY! I kid you not. ;)

I've seen Kevin in action as an uncle, and he is the best. Always willing to play. Always attentive. Always loving. If he never had this ridiculous illness, I know he would have been an incredible dad. Better than incredible.
Unfortunately, it's been almost 4 years since I last saw Kevin. He came up to Michigan to join us for Aidan's Baptism, June 2004, and by the end of that trip, he had decided he was not interested in going back to SC with my parents. Instead, he hitchhiked from MI all the way to San Diego. That's always been his preferred mode of transportation. ;)

I talk with Kevin on the phone frequently, and we send him pictures of our boys. He knows them from that, but Aidan doesn't really know who his Uncle Kevin is. I definitely feel he is missing out.

For today, I am connecting the two together. I don't have many pictures of them together, but the ones I do have, are priceless to me.
Wax on! Wax off!