Today I had my prenatal appointment. I'm 22 weeks along. Good heartbeat. Yay! This was my 2nd time with the new OB office. (moving & changing jobs meant changing insurance, thus doctors). My first impression of this practice was not a favorable one. They require you to see the nurse practitioner only the first visit. She was the type that treated pregnancy more like a disease rather than state of being. She was also the one who mocked our choice of practicing NFP, and smirked that "we weren't using protection". I so badly wanted to say "what do you think I need to protect myself from when I am with my husband?!". I never did, though. She was also the one who encouraged me to have genetic testing done during this pregnancy. I declined and scheduled only the big u/s they do around 20 weeks.
That's why I had a not-so-great first impression. I could understand her asking about me using birth control, but the word "protection", as if I was some high-school student that came in knocked up? No thank you.
The actual doctor was much friendlier and accepting of our choices. He prescribes birth control and everything, but also knows enough about NFP to know it is safe and effective. Good. He didn't mock us. Always a plus to make the patient feel comfortable. He listened to the heartbeat and then wanted to double check with me that I actually did decline the genetic testing, the quad test. I told him that was correct, I did decline. He was then very curious about this. Not pushy or a jerk like the n.p., but definitely wanted to make sure I understood what I was telling him. He said he felt I'd like to know of any problems, especially given my history. perplexity sets in.
My history? Here is my history. No problems during first pregnancy. Very healthy, though somewhat long, labor and delivery. Cute baby boy as you can see in the picture post below.
Second pregnancy started off just fine with no signs of complications. Turns out our 2nd baby died from Trisomy 18. My OB that handled everything explained that it was nothing particular to my genes or my husband's. He said it was one of those unfortunate fluke things that sometimes happens. It was that particular genetic make-up of that baby we lost. It was no indication of possible problems with future children.
Since he told me that and I trust him, I never convinced myself of the need to have genetic testing done during this pregnancy. I can understand the new doctor offering the info. to me. After all, that is his job. But he was so darn convincing, and now I am not sure if I am making the right decision! Yes, of course I'd like to know of any problems with the baby! I love to be prepared for any and all things. I have never felt that an invasive amnio would be worth that, however. Maybe it's not as invasive as I once thought? I don't know. I love my unborn baby. Declining the test shows nothing of the opposite. The doctor and nurse indicated I may regret not knowing of any possible problems. Yes, maybe. But would I not regret the amnio to some degree?
I also don't think I have some "history" that makes it sensible for them to say "given your history". Am I just being an over-sensitive pregnant woman? Even this same new doctor told me my body is not at risk or anything for pre-term labor. He said I am fortunate that my body went into labor on its own with the miscarriage. They did not have to force my cervix to dilate, etc. I have no abortions or anything, either, which he said is also reassuring of my body's abilities. So what gives when referring to "my history"?
I'm confused now on whether or not I am making the right decision. Have you ever had an amnio? Was it not as bad as perhaps I envision?
I just want to do what is best. I may be slacking in my diet by indulging in too many cookies lately, but I think that's the extent of my carelessness goes. This pregnancy has been such an emotional roller coaster for me. Prior to losing a baby, I accepted the minor aches and pains of being pregnant. Since losing a baby, however, I tend to worry a bit more, wondering if something else is going to go wrong. I'm just over the halfway mark. 18 more weeks. I can make it. The baby can make it. Should I do it all without testing?
3 comments:
Here is the way I put it with my OB during my last pregnancy, when they recommended tests because of my "advanced age" (36!!!!!)
"Will the tests show something that you can fix before the baby is born? If they can't, I don't want them."
Ultrasound will show some things that can be fixed, like spina bifida. All the other blood-based tests only show genetic stuff that no one can do a thing about. And the false positive (bad result) rate is quite high.
YMMV. Whatever you decide to do, you & your baby will be in my prayers to St. Gerard & the Blessed Mother for a safe pregnancy & birth.
Thank you, Barb. I appreciate the prayers.
And please, "advacned age" of 36! My mother had me at 38!
My dh and I have talked a bit about it since he got home, and he is not itnerested at all in having the testing. I feel reassured! Thank God I do not have to make such a decision alone.
Hey girl. I like what Barb had to say. Everyone is different. Some people want to know as much as possible and be reassured that things are "ok". An amnio can do that. An US can also pick up on many things as well and it' less invasive.
I think you made a good decision. Don't worry about it any more and enjoy your pregnancy! :)
Post a Comment